Catching Rainbows

>> Wednesday, May 28, 2008


O.k. So I haven't blogged in a long, long time. People are actually starting to complain. Well, complain might in fact be too strong a word, but it has been noticed and commented upon by two or three of my six quasi regular readers. That's right folks, you read it correctly, six quasi regular readers. My stock's going up in the world. Speaking of worlds you are no doubt all desperately curious to know what's been happening in mine. The answer, as always, is not really very much. And as always, you're gonna get a rundown anyways. What the hell, I've got ten minutes before I leave for the bright lights of the big city of Nanaimo.... Quit laughing and pick yourself up of the floor. Yes I'm going to Nanaimo tonight to see the new Indiana Jones movie. And compared to Comox, Nanaimo is pretty fecking thrilling. That's how dull my life is. I've accepted it, and kindly request that you do the same.  No need for any comments along the lines of  "you need to get a life..."

So here's what's happened to me since my concussion in no particular order:
  • I rolled my boat in the surf. It was fun. And slightly scary. Which in retrospect is probably why it was fun.
  • I caught some weird flu bug when I came back to Comox from Deroche. I couldn't eat anything for 5 days. It sucked.
  • I argued vehemently with Paul Bailey.
  • I caught a rainbow.
  • I got rather intoxicated at Dana's and rode my bike home. On the way back I stopped and had a conversation with a deer. He ignored me.
  • I attempted to play the bagpipes. Dana's dog tried to run away from home. Coincidence? Who could ever say for sure?
  • I have spent at least a dozen hours of my life listening to Mr "let me tell you all about ME" in class. That's 12 hours of my life I'll never get back.
  • I have discovered, thanks to Tyler (all bow down before Tyler), the free bubble shooter game on the internet. My new dream is that from now on, all of Blair's classes will be in the computer lab so I can play this instead of pretending to listen to him. Really I shouldn't be so mean. He's a good teacher. Honest. I am a bad person. BAD.
  • I got my pictures in the front window of the Muir Gallery in Courtenay. Because I rock. Also because no one else really wanted that spot. But I did have to fight Paul Bailey in order to get it. So it still feels like a victory.
So that's about it. My ten minutes are up. The bright lights of Nanaimo and a geriatric Indy beckon...

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An Injury for March

>> Monday, March 10, 2008


Like most other people out there, I'd like to believe that I am making progress of some sort or another in my life.  Sadly, the older I get the more I find my self repeating the same cycle over and over ad nauseum.  I thought I'd made a big leap forward in the past twelve months.  Afterall, I finally came to the realization that I was not cut out for office work, or tour guiding work, or social work (as it turns out possibly not cut out for work of any sort).  In any case.  I guess what I'm trying to say is I've made some huge changes in my life, and you would think it would follow that as a result I would break free of past cycles.  Except, apparently not.  I haven't checked, but I'm pretty sure that last year, just about this exact time, I was sitting down to type out a blog about my repeatedly sprained left ankle.  I'm happy to report my left ankle is just fine folks.  The swelling never did go away completely, but whatever.  I'm happy enough that it's functional and supports all my weight without any pain.  So no sob story about sprains.  Oh no.  This year I'd like to tell you the tale of a how I twisted my knee and concussed myself, all in the same 48 hour period...  So.  Last Thursday I head up the mountain, all glad that it was snowing and having a grand old time.  Sure, I couldn't see more than two feet in front of me, but I actually think that's why I was nailing all my turns (I couldn't see down the impossibly steep mountain, therefore I was not afraid to point my snowboard towards certain doom).  All went well until I tried to get on the Whiskey jack chair for another run down the hill, at which point in time I somehow managed to spin around so I was facing the chair as it sped towards me.  I had visions of missing teeth and fractured jaws, but I managed to recover my footing.  Mostly.  My board caught in the snow and I twisted my knee rather painfully.  Thus ended what otherwise would have been a perfect night of boarding.  I was pretty gimpy the next day so I took Friday as a day of rest, ignoring Tyler's advice to "ride it off" (I'm pretty sure that only works when you're nineteen years old).  Still, Saturday rolled around and I was feeling pretty good, so off I went.  I was doing pretty good, trying to get in as many runs as possible before heading to the college art show. I check my watch, 7:30.  Time for two more runs.  I decide the green run's probably best, I can work on my turns.  I ignore the man standing outside the Mountain Tek yelling at his son to "shut the hell up and get over here", crank my ipod, strap on my board, and I'm off...  All goes well for about 50 metres.  I turn around, catch an edge, fall.  And holy feckin' shit I hit the ground like a ten megaton nuclear bomb, right on my head.  God it hurt.  Cringe.  I empty my stomach (so glad I stopped at McShits on the way up), and slowly, slowly, sit up.  Pretty sure I'm swearing a blue streak by this point in time. And there up at the top of the trail is the family who'd been shouting at one another as I left, all standing around and staring at me.  Bastards just turn around and leave.  So I take off my helmet and check for any obvious dents or holes in the back of my skull, unstrap my board, limp back to the car. Somehow manage to take my boots off.  Get in the driver's seat and flip open my phone to check the time. Realise I can read it with my right eye only.  7:44 p.m.  I try again with my left eye, it reads 7: 4, a bright white spot obliterates the middle of anything I look at.  But I figure what the hell, I can see good enough out of my right eye, I can do this. I set off down the mountain, the lights from the ski runs leaving jagged, flashy trails of red and blue light across my vision.  So I go slowly, and it takes me a good 40 minutes to make a 20 minute drive.  I head straight to the clinic only to find it's closed, but since the supermarket's right there and I'm out of milk, I make a little stop.  Buy the milk, get some pineapple juice (an impulse buy that made perfect sense at the time), and decide that I should also check out the art show, since I went to the trouble of submitting a couple of pieces.  Run into a few classmates, but can't stand the god awful noise and light of the place so I leave.  In the parking lot I run into an old teacher and his wife, and after a rather confused conversation with them I decide that really I should go to the hospital.  So I do, only to sit there for two hours, trapped in the noisy hell that all emergency wards seem to be.  Doctor threatens to keep me overnight, so I lie, tell him I'm going to a friend's.  At this point in time I'd be happy to die if only it means I don't have to listen to the other patients and the nurses...  Worst moment of the night:  I phone my mother, tell her what's happened.  Listen to her say "I told you so".  Not in so many words, but you get my drift...  I'm happy to say I'm on the mend.  Tired all the time, still have a headache and the occasional moment of vertigo, it hurts to laugh, or cough... Sneezing is excruciatingly painful.  But still.  At least I can see out of my left eye again.  And I'm looking forward to the weekend.  Another chance to go boarding.  I thought it only appropriate that for this post's picture I feature the helmet that probably saved my life.  I don't think I would have walked away from this one if I hadn't been wearing it. Best $33.00 I ever spent in my life.  Never mind that when I wear it I look like I should be riding the short bus...


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A Post for February

>> Thursday, February 21, 2008


So.... Once again it would seem that I have let my blogging slide. I really have no excuse, all sorts of interesting things have happened in my world recently. Why, just last week I went for coffee at a Paintball business, where we were served by a singing, one-legged man who barked like a dog. No word of a lie. No doubt my four quasi-regular readers must be wondering why I haven't written in so long. I suppose there are any number of reasons. For one, I've been busy writing something else, a work of fiction (gasp!). Not too sure where it all came from, never mind where it's going but it is consuming the time I would normally reserve for this blog. Also there is my whole snowboarding obsession to consider. Now that I've bought a season's pass for night boarding I feel compelled to go every night I can. Need to get my money's worth you understand. Overwhelmingly though, I think I've come down with a case of terminal apathy. Though maybe not, as I am apparently still capable of feeling jealousy. Like for example, several people I know are right now, as I type this, off wandering the globe in exotic-sounding locales. Dammit. It's just not fair... So I'm sure you all get why it is that I haven't been writing. Oh yeah, and school. Quite busy with that too. I'm actually writing this in class... Very poor form that. I should go. Adding a random picture for visual interest.

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Oh My Aching Arse

>> Sunday, January 20, 2008

When I decided to take up snowboarding everyone I told warned me it was going to be a painful experience.   They were wrong.  Despite countless spills and scrapes I always felt pretty decent after boarding.  Until Friday, which turned out to be a banner day for wrecking things.  The first thing I hurt was my poor sorry arse which took such a bruising that I am still today sitting on a cushion.  I hit the ground so hard I got an instant headache, even though my melon didn't touch the ground.  I tell you, that's just not right.  72 hours later I still have a headache, nothing too bad but it's just not going away.  I think I gave myself whiplash.  Just to put this whole thing in perspective for you (yes my four quasi-regular readers I am addressing this blog to you) I was at the bottom of the ruddy bunny hill when it happened.  Then, to make the night complete, I somehow managed to rip the bottom of my left boot, I think when I skidded to a very fast halt in an attempt not to flatten some schmuck who had the great misfortune of falling on their arse right in front of me.  I somehow ended up standing on the back edge of the board on one foot.  I had no idea my board could bend like that...  So now I have to find a new pair of boots to go with my click-in bindings...  I'm feeling very sorry for myself...  But still looking forward to heading back up the mountain as soon as possible.  Hopefully I can get new boots by Thursday.

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A New Obsession for 2008

>> Sunday, January 13, 2008


People often criticize me for being obsessive.  I rarely say anything to them about it, but it kind of bugs me.  First off, it's my life, and I'll live it the way I please thank you very much. Secondly, just because they might happen to be  jaded and bitter about the world that surrounds them doesn't mean that I have to be (and you'd think they'd notice that I was nice enough not to point out their lack of enthusiasm, but no).  Maybe it's just that when I do something I do it with all my energy.  Whatever.  There is a point to all of this.  I have found a new obsession to go along with the new year: snowboarding.  I really can't explain it because at any given moment (if I stop to think about it) I am terrified by the thought of sliding down a mountain with both feet strapped to a single board.  So every time I arrange to go up the mountain with someone I have to psych myself up.  And then there I am, sliding down the mountain at an incredibly high rate of speed still totally, completely freaked out of my mind.  And inevitably I fall, usually on my ass (so far my all time coolest trick is to fall on my ass, do a backwards somersault, stand up and keep going), but sometimes right on my face, and on one memorable occasion rolling sideways down the hill, which is somewhat less fun than one might imagine when you take into consideration the fact that I had 149 cms of fiberglass and wood attached to my feet. Still, the pain of those moments is fleeting, and I get back up and keep on heading down the mountain. And I always have an awesome time.  So much so that I really wonder why it is I waited until now to learn to do this.  It could only have been easier if I'd started 10 years ago.  On a bit of an aside, learning to snowboard was a 2007 New Year's resolution.  I might be 12 months late, but I'm finally getting it done.  In the hopes that 2009 will bring another breakthrough of a similar sort I hereby resolve that 2008 will be the year I get into disgustingly great shape, find a dream job as a travel photographer, meet the man of my dreams and win an obscene amount of money on the Super7 or 649 (which I realize will require that I actually buy tickets).  Oh, and I resolve to be nicer to everyone too, even if they bug me. Look out 2009. Here I come.

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